2010 - V

If an impulsive decision has been made once, it's understandable; twice, it's still understandable; but in retrospect, if most of your life's decisions are based on the foundations of impulsive thoughts and actions, then you've got another thing going on. And so be my life as well.


After much thinking and careful re-thinking/reflecting I realize that there have been only a handful of choices I have made after much deliberation. So I've clearly sped through these many decision-making years riding high on the impulsiveness factor. Studying at MCC for 5 years, studying at Christ for the next 2, choosing Arts (with History which I loathed) for PUC, choosing PyEC (Mass Comm.) as my UG course, choosing to take a year off, deciding to work and applying for my interview whilst on my way back from Goa, making pit stops for socializing and dating, deciding one random evening to major in psychological counseling for my masters, taking a break after my masters to choosing my present field of work - ALL seem to be based on impulse. I do not even want to think about the less crucial decisions and how impulsive they've been. 


However, I have no regrets. None whatsoever. And I can say that with my eyes closed minus a second glance/thought because one from all these impulses has proven to be one of THE BEST things that could've ever happened to me. 


Teaching. 


I never ever thought I would get into this field and have actively run away from anything close to this field. Which is why when I was offered to think about this field, I immediately discarded the offer in search for more lucrative (or maybe not) pastures. However, one fine morning I found myself on my way back to college, standing at the other side of the line as it were. And there hasn't been any looking back ever since.


I still do question a lot of things and I still see so much more happening in my life apart from just books and teaching for I love too many things too much apart from teaching. I still do not know if this is the profession for me and I'm still unsure about what I really want from life, and I guess that's ok. But having said that, teaching has shown me a side to life I never knew about. And trust me, it's got nothing to do with the authority or the power that comes with this profession.


Teaching = heartfelt emotion to me. There is nothing more pure than the feeling that teaching gives. There is nothing more overwhelming than to know that you've contributed to the bigger picture. There is nothing more exciting than discovering new ways with new people with so much energy around. Teaching is something that has made me love my life a little bit more, and it's a feeling and experience I fathom hard to explain.


I constantly find myself reminiscing and looking back at what was and 2010 has given me so much more than I could've asked for. 2010 has been a year of full circles. 


Full circle A - picking up that dirty 2nd PU textbook and teaching psychology to 2nd PU classes. I adore these students - their innocence, their energy, their enthusiasm, their mischief, their curiosity, their playfulness, their discipline, their creativity, their being. I love them. These 150 odd students take me back to my roots and it's nice to head there once in a while.

HEPP (N) - my PUC class

PPES (O) - my other PUC class

Full circle B - teaching psychology at the UG level to the students who are studying the same course I did, back in UG i.e. PyEC/CEP. This is a class that shows me what a real roller-coaster ride is all about. The ups and downs have shown me just how much there is to do and how much we're still to achieve. This is a journey I've embarked on with my 1st years and I couldn't be more thrilled. And sometimes all it takes to move ahead is the faith they have in you. I love my class. I love how absolutely brilliant they are, how beautiful they are, how annoying they can be, how frikkin talented they are, how responsive they are, how bursting with life they are. I cannot have enough of them. They are one of THE BEST things that have happened to me this year and I feel so damn lucky. 


Sometimes it takes 1 person to know where you can be and sometimes it takes 73 people to know where you need to be.


73 X madness
73 X curiosity
73 X creativity
73 X irritation
73 X love
73 X respect


And that's 73 reassurances, I'd like to believe.

Being crazy mad

One for my blog

One for the road

That's my 73, that's my CEP.


Sometimes life takes you by surprise, 73 at a time :)